A New Lease of Life…

Ok, so I could say life returned to normal?  No.  It took a lot longer to get anywhere near. 

The first two weeks whilst the legs were still weak, I had to have help getting in and out of the shower.  Dad fitted me a hand rail on the wall above the bath which proved invaluable. I could dry myself and do everything I needed, but that was it.  Mark was at home the first week and would help me on the stairs as I concentrated on each step, mentally going through the routine we had done in hospital.  Laura was with me for the second week when I became a little more confident about the house.  However, if she went out I would make sure I was sorted and didn’t need anything and stay in the bedroom.  I felt so useless and I think I was a little hard on myself in expecting things to return to normal almost immediately; when you are used to doing your own thing then it is harder to rely on other people.

On the third week, I was home alone.  I had the community nurse coming in to change my dressings and Yvonne would call round to see me.  I would then be downstairs while I had company.  I made sure everything was done before getting back upstairs and staying in my safe haven until either Mark or Laura returned home. 

One day when I was able to get myself in and out of the bath,  I decided to have a soak, Mark was due home late and Laura was out so I thought a bit of relaxation would help. Hmmmmm, hadn’t really thought that one through though!  I filled the bath and got everything to hand, stepped in with the right leg, held onto the rail and lifted the left leg in to find the water temperature WAY too hot.  That was the day I discovered the nerve damage in the right leg was severe and I had no sensation to hot or cold.  Not the best way to find out however!! 

Once sorted, I got myself sat in the bath and realised that with the dressings still on the back, I wouldn’t be able to lie down, thus realising it wasn’t going to be such a relaxing time after all.  I made the best of it and then decided to get out, another dilemma!  Two legs which were un-co-ordinated, didn’t know how to get out of the bath!  In the end, I drained the water, got myself onto my knees and then pulled myself up with the rail and the side of the bath.  Wasn’t going to try that again in a hurry!

I soon learnt to do housework things as I became more mobile, and with the aid of daytime TV (it bores you so much you WANT to do housework!) I managed to do a little ironing, washing and even cleaning the fire out with the use of the Zimmer frame to help me up!  By the time I had done even the smallest chore, I was ready for a rest but it was progression. 

I lived for the weekends when we could go out.  The first weekend we went out was football that Mark coaches; I spent the entire morning sat in the car watching the autumn leaves blow around, the sun was bright but the air was cold, it didn’t matter, I just loved the feeling of the open space. 

Being out in the wheelchair was another thing though.  Despite my initial thoughts on not having one, reality was that I needed one.  I was unable to walk any distance so if I wanted to go into town or to the shop, I had to use one.  After calling into work one day to see everyone, we went for a walk around town.  I got so upset at not being able to get around, the pavements being uneven and hazardous, the roads intimidating and the shops inaccessible, we gave up and came home.

Even the run up to Christmas saw me getting equally frustrated at shops.  I was good at manoeuvring my vehicle but shops packed their displays so tightly, I often found myself stuck.  Mark would joke that he knew where I was because he could see something moving and not see anyone standing!  I realise how, as a nation, we are not disabled friendly with card machines at silly heights, displays not accessible and worse still, the attitude of people towards a wheel chair user.  Mark generally pushed the chair and shop assistants would speak to him instead of me.  That was something that angered me immensely.  I was in a wheel chair, my disability, albeit temporary, were my legs not my mind!  Even other shoppers were less than patient with the wheel chair – I challenge anyone to spend a week in a wheelchair, let’s see if their attitude changes then!  I also noted that people would be less considerate when parking vehicles; I don’t have a disabled badge and don’t intend to get one, but people seem to abuse them, I now have a different understanding of disabilities. Rant Over!

Autumn